I can’t draw, can’t paint, and good heavens, can’t sculpt. So in an effort to do something creative, I’ve recently taken to woodturning.  There’s something magical to me about taking a tool to a square block of wood and watching a bowl emerge.  The fresh smell of the green wood, the gentle spray of the released moisture, and the soft hum of the shavings peeling from the log create a sensory experience that is both satisfying and, for me, profoundly soothing.  Except when it isn’t.  Because, as in any craft, woodturning is really really hard to do and beginners must endure some pretty humbling attempts.  But in the process of learning I’ve discovered a metaphor that I’m finding useful to apply as a life lesson.  I share it with you today as I prepare for my next class in turning and changing.

Skilled woodturners can use the edge of their tool with such skill, they create deep and efficient cuts with little effort.  In fact, the learning process of turning is how to find the right angle that allows the sharpened edge to ride the grain of the wood, maximizing the cut with precision and minimal resistance.  You hold the tool as the lathe begins to turn and feel for the angle, much like I imagine a surfer does when catching a wave.  Find that right connection, and like magic, the blade rides along the wood creating a long tail of shavings with an almost effortless pressure on the part of the turner.  It takes a lot of patience to feel for that right angle, especially as a beginner.  Your instinct is to push when you are eager to make the cut.  But applying pressure, especially when the angle is wrong, only causes you to catch the blade on the wood, creating a loud cracking sound and a big divot in your piece.  Not only does it feel awful, as the tool kicks back at you, sound horrible, with an awful jolting noise, but a “catch”, as it is called, tends to make everyone in the shop turn and look at you!  

It makes sense that the first step in making an effective cut, then, is to take a deep breath, exhale, and relax your body.  (Thanks Jerry Kermode, my first teacher).  It feels counterintuitive, as your instinct is to want to lean in with pressure.  But the more anxious you are, the more rigid your body, the more you are likely to force a cut and catch the edge on your piece, leading to potential disaster.  And this feels like a familiar pattern to me, in many areas of life.  When I want something to happen, I push at it.  The more anxious I am about it, the harder I press.  Even when I can feel the approach is wrong, I get panicky and dig in.  But sometimes, trying harder is not the right answer.  Sometimes it’s best to take a step back, breathe, and look for a better angle.

The best example for me is in relationships.  When I feel misunderstood, I can be reactive.  I get activated and push back, sometimes causing the other person to become defensive.  Then in response to their defensiveness, I push harder and in essence double down. Rather than bringing me closer to the other person, in reality my feeling of being misunderstood only grows. Except now I feel misunderstood and self righteous.  None of it helps me get to my ultimate goal of feeling more connected to the person I care about.

I do believe these are the times when taking a deep breath is probably what is most needed.  When we find ourselves tense and activated, we become reactive rather than thoughtful.  We miss opportunities to go with the flow of a situation and risk having it turn out in ways that are actually not what we want or intend.  But it takes great awareness to fight the instinct to push hard on something we care about and discipline to pull back from it.  But a wise life craftsman has the experience to know that backing off and waiting for the right approach is most often far more effective.  And it also lowers our risk of “catching” and having everyone turn as they hear our mistake!  (Yes, that was me cursing at my laptop at the coffee shop. Darn thing never listens.).

For many years I’ve read about the benefits of mindfulness and meditation.  I truly believe it works and know people who swear by it.  I even recommend it to the people I work with, encouraging them to download apps to practice.  But to be honest, truth be told, I can’t get myself to do it.  I try, but it just doesn’t seem to stick.  I’ve even joined all  kinds of yoga classes and walking meditation groups, but it’s just never something I choose to do without forcing myself.  What is wrong with me, I wonder?  (Besides being a hypocrite).  And then as I read an article in a psychology journal, the answer seemed so simple.  According to research, maybe I just need something more fun!

For many people the idea of dancing is down right scary.  The self consciousness takes away any fun they might experience.  But research shows that if we can get past the awkwardness, dancing can be a more effective tool than meditation, yoga, or other forms of exercise for lowering stress levels and increasing a sense of well being.  In fact, there is evidence that human culture evolved through dance and that dancing is hardwired into our brains.  Cave drawings show evidence of people dancing over 7,000 years ago! And three week old babies show evidence that they can begin to sync up their movements to the beat of music played around them.  We seem to naturally find pleasure and joy in dancing, if only our embarrassment didn’t get in the way.  We are all dancers, it seems, but we truly differ in how comfortable we are with letting ourselves express it.

So here are a few reasons to give it a try.  Dancing combines several activities that each alone are good for our health – exercising, listening to music, and connecting with other people.  In one study, participants spent 90 minutes either doing hatha yoga, African dance or listening to a biology lecture (ok, was that a fair comparison?).  Results showed that both yoga and dance helped significantly reduce stress and negative emotions.  But only the dance participants had an increase in positive emotions. Other studies comparing various forms of exercise and mindfulness with dance classes also show the superior benefit of dance.  Participants in these studies seemed to consistently describe the feeling of creativity and excitement that emerged from the dance experience.  They also describe feeling more confident and energized.  One study even collected saliva samples and found that the dancer group had the largest drop in cortisol levels, the biological basis to the experienced reduction in stress.

Dance seems to transport us into a state of flow where we forget about our troubles and regulate our biological systems.  It opens us up to emotional experiences through the music and helps us to get in touch with our bodies in a playful way.  It brings people together and fosters a sense of connection and belonging.  There is something tribal and simple about moving your body in sync with a beat surrounded by other people.  Dance also seems to have good results as a treatment for depression and anxiety in many studies.  Meta analysis of the benefits for dance consistently show that the dance study participants came to associate their dance class with both a social and a physical effect that lifted their spirits.  In other words, it was fun!

Proof in concept?  In one of the studies, a group of 100 people with depression were split them into three groups.  One group learned tango, the other practiced mindfulness, and the third group was on a wait list.  Results showed that both mindfulness and tango helped lower depression levels compared to the waitlist group.  But at the completion of the study, when researchers asked participants if they wanted vouchers to continue either the mindfulness class or the tango class, guess what?  Over 97% of the participants chose the dance lessons!  Make it fun…and they will come.  Now maybe I can find a dance app to replace my meditation one. Or shut the door, pull the curtains, and schedule a dance party with myself where noone can see me!

My heart feels heavy this July 4th.  Our nation, which I love so dearly, feels at a perilous time in both the faith in and functioning of its democratic institutions.  Reproductive rights and gun legislation are out of step with the majority of American public opinion.  Our Nation’s Capital was attacked based on lies by politicians motivated solely by holding on to power, no matter the cost.  The people of our country are so divided, the promise of a melting pot protected by founding principles of freedom and liberty for all at times rings hollow.  And yet, thousands die in desperate attempts, leaving behind and risking their all, to find sanctuary here with the hope of a better future for their children.

As I work to process all the change that is happening, my mind often hits a point of overwhelm at the realization of how absurd and abstract a society really is.  The pain and suffering that so many experience in the separation of who is privileged and who is oppressed are all based on ideas.  Abstract, arbitrary ideas.  So much of what we are bound and determined by are just concepts that people made up and continue to believe in – money, beauty, citizenship, who are our enemies, and what defines success. At its essence, the basis of every society are values and opinions shaped by those with the cultural entitlements of authority and power.

And yet, these ideas have the most profound impacts.  We live by them and we die for them.  We are provided safety under them and we go to war over them.  It is only through them that we can maintain a functional civilized order that enables institutions to uncover truths, solve problems, and of utmost importance, reflect on itself.  

As I think of the long arc of the moral universe that Martin Luther King, Jr had such faith in bending toward justice, I am heartened by the power of what fair laws and the ideas behind them can actually do.  The Civil Rights Act of 1964 is such an important example of how critical legislation is for change.  Recently, Title IX had its 50th anniversary.  We still struggle with the implementation of the many rights protected under these laws, such as voting, public education, housing, fair trials, and other forms of freedom, but without the codified law prohibiting discrimination, we would have no foundation for the ongoing pressure needed for justice’s bending.

During the many opportunities I’ve had in driving across these United States I am never at a loss to find beauty.  I am in awe as I contemplate how these canyons, valleys, and mountain ranges dwarf our society in their power and in their longevity.  It seems a bit comical to think that what “We, the People” covet and define as “our America” has not always been and will not always be.  Plate tectonic scientists agree that our planet has manifested at least seven versions of a supercontinent long before us. And our countries and continents will surely unite again in a far distant future.  But here we are for now, a nation defined as this particular region at this particular point in time.  And with this, the color of our skin, our gender identity and sexuality, the religion we practice, the social and economic status of our parents, will all have enormous implications for our well being solely based upon this great intersection of place and time and the ideas and values that manifest there.

I am tremendously grateful for being born a US citizen in this era.  I can vote, I can choose to marry who I please, and I can achieve my educational and professional goals.    I aspire to remember and celebrate all who have fought for justice so that I may have these privileges. Because I take none of this for granted, I am also so keenly aware of the opposite possibility and the fragility of freedom in the hands of authority. We must all share in the responsibility to participate in and uphold our democratic principles and demand accountability to the protection of equality and opportunity for all.

I consider myself a patriot who dearly loves this country:  Sweet land of liberty, of thee I sing.  And as with any great love, there are times you must bask in and celebrate its beauty and uniqueness.  But at other times, you must do more than merely sing of it, particularly because you hold it so dear.