Every January fitness centers and gyms see their membership numbers jump and the parking lots fill up.  While it’s wonderful that so many people feel energized and motivated with the opportunity for a fresh start in the New Year, it always makes me sad to know the statistic that the average person who signs up for a new gym membership will no longer be going in March.  So with this reality, how can we help our good intentions last and avoid wasting money and feeling guilty every time the gym membership automatic payment goes through?

It’s easy to be swept up in the appeal of a New Year.  It provides a clean slate and a fresh start.  Unfortunately, we also tend to be swept up in thinking that the new year will bring a new us.  I know for myself, I can easily get drawn into some magical thinking that just by declaring a new me with new behaviors, the deed will be done.  And it does work for the first week, and maybe if I’m lucky, the first month, which makes me think it’s all about my willpower.  But day by day, my true life settles in and I realize that my New Year still holds my old life, full of my old responsibilities and stresses and all the reasons that led to my overeating and skipping workouts and canceling my mammogram appointments, etc.  I get angry with myself and resigned that I just don’t have the willpower anymore and may never have enough to live as I would hope.

But research over the past few years has shown something important that may be a key to helping us sustain our effort.  It is not about willpower.  Willpower is not enough and can not sustain us through the realities of our stressful lives.  The best way to be effective in maintaining our change is not magical, not fresh, and not new.  The people who are most successful at making change are able to address the realities of their lives and rather than creating a new life, make a plan for how to incorporate change into their already existing one.  In general, this means small changes, day by day, step by step.  It also means assessing and planning each day for the next day’s challenges and being flexible to maintain our best effort given our limitations.

For example, a woman I know who has a busy job and kids decided she was going to lose weight by working out in the morning before her family got up and also do a low carb diet.  She was so excited about this as she had read about the quick weight loss that can be obtained by this combination.  And it “worked” for the first month, as she was so happy to report losing 5 pounds.  What  was also happening, however, was a lack of sleep and a lot of extra stress in cooking and shopping for her new diet, as she found she had to make several types of meals for her various family members.  By the end of the second month, she was more stressed, losing sleep in the morning from getting up so early, and staying up late to prepare several lunches and meals for the next day.  This effort wore her down, and by the end of the second month, she was “cheating” by eating out more often, and stressed by the money she was spending on extra meals.  She was also cranky and overslept some days, and then got injured because she tried to over exercise on the weekend to make up for the morning workouts she slept through.  The result was weight loss stagnation, a strained hamstring, along with  a lot of frustration and disappointment.

So good for us as we start the new year with some good intentions, but let’s also be real with ourselves about the old life we bring into the New Year.  Rather than thinking about being 15 pounds lighter and wearing the cute summer dress for the BBQ in July, just think about tomorrow.  What is your day really going to look like?  What does the week ahead hold in store?  How can you make a plan that will be reasonable and doable, with small changes that won’t lead to rebellion or defeat?

Rather than thinking in terms of a New Year, it is actually more effective to think of a new day.  What do you need to take care of you as best as possible for this day, finding balance and involving small efforts that you are likely to feel good about it?  And what will you enjoy?  If you don’t like going to the gym, don’t join one!  Just because there was a great deal, think about tomorrow:  Would you rather go to the gym or go for a walk with your best friend?  Because as the tomorrows pass by, if you enjoy the todays, you will be much more likely to be doing it in March, when all the gyms are empty!